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Fashion Crimes Podcast

Jul 16, 2021

Happy Summer Vacation!! Holly and Nolan are hanging out this week, talking Summer Wardrobe smack. Talking about people. Talking about what we're doing. Talking about where we're going. And, uhm, this brought up a very sensitive subject with Nolan, because he's got a lot of fashion beef. So, we ask: “What's your beef, Nolan? What are the Fashion Crimes we need to be aware of this summer?” 

Nolan has some major rants this week about Summer Wardrobe Do’s and Don’ts:  

Men don’t get tend to get pedicures; therefore, they don’t get to wear flip-flops.  Summer does not mean you get to be a freaking slob. READ THE ROOM, People! Or, Read the Beach! The beaches in Maine are lovely and all (and the Bush family compound is there), but it’s not the Hamptons. And it certainly ain’t Martha’s Vineyard. So plan your outfits accordingly.  

Our Stylists Extraordinaire help you plan and pack for your summer adventures.  Flip-flops are for the beach (and for women), while sexy sandals – or preferably Valentino Rock Stud block heels - are perfect for dinners out.  

Holly makes the point that, if it’s hanging out, you gotta throw it out. Shorts that are too short and boobs that are falling out are “No Bueno!” It’s important to invest in a well-fitting swimsuit.  Pull that stuff in ladies! Try on a goddamn Miracle Suit, for the love of God! It's life-changing...for reals. And no one paid us to say that.

 And in other news, while we don’t like fast fashion, you don’t need to break the bank to buy stylish. Nolan educates Holly on the latest Target designer collaborations. Holly starts Googling – right in the middle of the show – and falls in love with the Christopher John Rogers dresses. We do love a good Target collab moment!!!  And talk about it extensively.  

And don’t forget your summer style etiquette: Casual wedding settings do not mean ‘dress casual.’ Have some respect, please!! When in doubt – overdress. And Nolan reminds us of his formal point of view on this: You don’t wear white to a wedding, but you do wear black to a funeral. “To me, it's the ultimate form of disrespect. It says I don't care enough about you, because I don't care enough about you to put my best foot forward. And that, to me, is unacceptable. I would rather be overdressed than underdressed.” Preach, Queen!! 

Don’t miss Nolan’s PTSD Prada flip-flop story, (very dramatic), and how it relates to Sex in the City. If you need to know, go check out Season 6, Episode 9 when Carrie is ‘shoe shamed” for her extravagant lifestyle. If you know, you know.  

You say you are ready for a summer vacation, but, are you really ‘ready’? Listen now for your best summer self ever!  


1:17 Holly 

What. Is. Going. On? We're hanging out today, talking smack. Talking about people. Talking about what we're doing. Talking about where we're going. And, uhm, this brought up a very sensitive subject with Nolan, because he's got a lot of beef. What's your beef? Nolan? What's your fashion beef?  

1:39 Nolan 

It's a different vibe, right? If you go to the Hamptons, you're going not just for the beach, but for the parties, and the shopping, and the restaurants, and like, that sort of the crowd. It's the same thing with like Martha's Vineyard, Nantucket, and Cape Cod -you sort of go for the beaches. Or, if you're gay, you go to Provincetown, and, like, do a bunch of coke.  

3:19 Nolan 

Nolan was at a “friend’s” house in the summer one year, and their puppy chewed through his Prada flip-flops. “Oh, Hell No! That happened. Your dog chewed them? What would you do if your dog chewed through someone's shoes? What would the first words out of your mouth be? It should be: Oh my god, I'll buy you a new pair. I'm so sorry!” 

7:37 Holly and Nolan debate Birkenstocks, AGAIN! Ew.

9:55 Nolan

“Okay, Queen - it's one thing if it's a casual lunch, but if you're going to a nice dinner, put some fucking shoes on, for the love of God. “ 

10:26 Nolan 

You dress very differently depending on where you're going for the summer. If you go to the Outer Banks, it's very different. You wear different clothes. Of course, when you're going to Nantucket, or when you go to the Hamptons, you need to read the room. It just depends on how fancy the area is. 

14:40 Nolan gives Holly the 411 on this summer’s Target designer collaborations. Everyone can try out some of the world’s best designs at an easy entry point. Designers like Alexis, Rixo, and Christopher John Rodgers have wowed us this summer with their bold, vibrant, and accessible fashions! 

20:48 Holly 

Read. The. Room. Know your audience. Know where you're going. Don't wear some whack shit to a summer wedding. Don't do that. That's my biggest pet peeve is people who underdress for a wedding. A lot of people don't understand that. Oh, the wedding is casual! Well, that doesn't mean you roll up in some shit that you wear every day. It’s still special, right? You should look good and look nice. 

25:01 Holly 

Invest in a well-fitting swimsuit. They cost a fortune. It's not like it's a small investment. They can be expensive. But, it is the best thing I've ever done.

Key Takeaways: 

  • Plan your summer wardrobe accordingly: Where are you going? What is the vibe there? Casual beach? Beach chic?  
  • Invest in a good-fitting bathing suit. If your stuff is hanging out, throw it out.  
  • Don’t underdress for a summer wedding, even if it is casual. 
  • You don’t need to break the bank: Target x Designer Collaborations this summer are AWESOME! 
  • Your extravagant shoe lifestyle might not be your AirBnb’s problem. 
  • Do we agree: Men should not wear flip-flops Do we really want to see man toes? It's a no from me, dog.

Links Discussed here:  

Sex In the City: 


“Hands down: if your shorts are too short; if you're a guy, and your swim shorts are too short or they're too tight, or your ass or your boobs are hanging out - it's time for a new bathing suit. A bathing suit is a big investment. I will definitely give you that because they're not cheap anymore. But, you really get what you pay for.” – Holly  

“Grown men should not wear flip-flops. Guys don't get pedicures for the most part. I mean - I do, because, you know, me of course. But unless you're doing yard work, I don't give a shit. In which case, it's probably not safe because you might drop a chainsaw or something” – Nolan  

“I'm like, bitch, put a heel on, or put a Valentino block heel sandal on. A flip-flop is just a little too casual.” - Nolan